Click below for the full blog, or read on to see our most popular posts. The Kalish Law Office blog is written by attorney Laura Kalish. Check back frequently for new updates or email inquiries@kalishlawtexas.com to request a topic!
Caring for Your Aging Parents
Caring for aging parents presents a variety of challenges. Due to changing times and financial concerns, it is more important than ever to have a plan. Here are some situations in which you may find yourself:
- Your parent(s) have planned for their retirement years and have adequate assets, and presently do not need any assistance with day-to-day activities or finances, but you are beginning to be concerned for the future.
- Your parents(s) have some resources, and maybe even have a plan, but you don’t know the details and believe they may run out of assets while having serious medical needs.
- Your parent(s) have no assets, very limited assets, or adequate assets but poor physical health and you are definitely going to need to be involved with their physical and/or financial care.
Here are some challenges that may arise:
1. Siblings or Lack of Siblings: If you have siblings, there may be disagreement between you as to how to handle the situation. It is also common that parents fear showing favoritism and so they seek to avoid naming an executor, granting a power of attorney, and so on, even if they feel they need to. Siblings may avoid discussing the subject with the parents, or with each other, for fear of seeming dominating, or greedy. “Only” children have a different set of problems, especially when a parent lives far away, and even more so if the parent is alone. Onlies have no siblings to lean on or to ask for help and so they are often at a loss as to how to negotiate a parent’s aging issues.
2. Trust issues: There may be longstanding trust issues between parent and child. Or a reluctance on the part of the parent to see the child as a capable adult. There are also some physical ramifications of aging in some people, such as early Alzheimer’s disease and other brain-related conditions, that actually cause a lack of trust, or outright paranoia. It is therefore difficult or impossible to have a meaningful dialogue about health and financial issues with a person who cannot trust.
3. Fear of the loss of independence leading to procrastination: Older adults often find that it is difficult to even discuss anything that has to do with a loss of independence. This often leads to procrastination about planning for the future. Middle-aged or younger people have difficulty with this, get frustrated and sometimes feel that getting aggressive about decision-making is the only option. This can lead to even more resistance on the part of the older adult.
What Can you Do and How Can an Attorney Help?
- If your parent is willing, you can help him/her find a qualified estate planning attorney or elder law attorney. Your level of involvement will depend on your parent’s physical health and willingness/ability to be involved in such discussions. Your “help” may consist of nothing more than finding an appropriate attorney and giving the name and phone number to your parent, and/or driving him/her to the appointment and sitting in the waiting room. Your parent may also request more or less involvement from you than what you feel comfortable giving but having some knowledge about the situation may relieve some of your worry.
- You can see an attorney yourself. If you have concerns and want help with how to deal with the situation of an aging parent, you can see an attorney on your own. The attorney will guide you through the most common legal concerns that arise in these situations; for example: What are general powers of attorney and is one recommended? What are the considerations for health care powers of attorney and other related documents? What about medicare / Medicaid planning? What options are available for early distribution of real property or personal property to beneficiaries and what are some possible problems with this strategy? Is it desirable to try to avoid probate?
- It is often easier to discuss difficult issues in front of a third party. Whether the third party is an attorney, financial planner, family doctor or therapist, people often find that the professional office is a “safe place” to respectfully voice their concerns, questions and fears.
- An attorney can guide you to other resources. An attorney can help you find available social services, literature, websites, and other professionals that are beneficial to the journey that you are on with your parent. Your parent’s situation may require a “team effort” and a qualified elder care attorney can be part of that team.
When A Loved One Passes: A Practical and Legal Guide
During a time of grief, it can be difficult to function. This blog entry will serve as a guide to assist the surviving relative or friend, and can be printed and used as a checklist.
IMMEDIATELY
Locate the decedent’s Will and Powers of Attorney, if any exist. Read them to see if there are any wishes expressed about burial, cremation or funeral arrangements.
Locate life insurance policies, if any.
Make arrangements for care of decedent’s pets.
Make funeral arrangements (The funeral service will generally assist you with the following:
Decide on burial or cremation, type of funeral service
Decide on obituaries: Local newspaper, hometown newspaper, in professional or trade journal.
Discuss any burial benefits decedent may have, including those for service in the armed forces.
Obtain Death certificates
Notify Medicare/Medicaid/ Social Security/ Pension plans of decedent’s death.
Gather documents which show payment of funeral expenses.
AS SOON AS POSSIBLE
Make arrangements for care of decedent’s property and for mail pickup.
Have legal consultation:
Bring will, if any exists
Bring copy of death certificate
Discuss generalities of decedent’s family situation, heirs, assets and liabilities.
Get advice on payment of pending bills, dealing with banks or creditors
Bring contact information or names of heirs or potential heirs, if any.
Begin gathering list of property owned and how it is titled
Gather list of debts, including medical debts and funeral expenses.
Additional Information:
If the decedent put his/her will in a safe deposit box you may need a court order to open it (unless you have been authorized by the decedent)
If you are going to have to file an action in probate court, you should file within 4 years of the date of death.
There are certain legal requirements under Texas law which relate to notification of heirs and potential heirs, and notification of creditors. There are also laws relating to how a decedent’s estate is handled and persons who accept the responsibility of caring for the assets and debts in an estate can be held liable for wasting or mismanagement of assets in some cases.
It is always advisable to know the laws pertaining to your situation as they will depend on whether you are a surviving spouse, friend, and/or named executor.
Real Estate Investing: How a Lawyer Can Help You
How Assets are Split in a Divorce
When a couple is divorced in Texas, both the assets and liabilities are split in a final divorce decree.
A lot of different factors play a part in the decision that is made about how to split the assets. That is why it isn’t advisable to become focused on just one asset or one debt. You have to look at the whole picture.
When the divorce is final, there will be a final court order (decree) that will specify the split. Here are some of the factors that determine how the property and debts will be split:
1. Fault in the breakup of the marriage.
2. Current earning power or earning potential of the spouses. Additional considerations may be physical health or disabilities and whether one spouse supported the other spouse while s/he was being educated or trained, and whether one spouse was a stay-at-home parent.
3. Whether the split is fair to the spouses and the children of the marriage.
4. If there are children from the marriage, where they will be living most of the time, and how the split of property and debts will affect them.
5. Length of the marriage and property and debts accumulated during the marriage.
6. To some extent, whether the spouses own separate property. (Remember, the idea is to look at the “whole picture” and leave the parties in a position to support themselves and the children).
7. Needs of the children. If the children have any special needs these will be considered.
Your attorney will help you in deciding what is best for you and whether it is something you can realistically expect to achieve.